News of the San Gabriel Valley since 1966.


By Joe Torosian

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“I can’t think of the finish.”—Chico

“Funny, I can’t think of

anything else.”—Groucho

Anyone ever watch “The Walking Dead”?

…No, I’m not talking about Lakers basketball.

While I am big on people saying “Merry Christmas”…I have never, ever, been big on people saying “Happy New Year” to me.

Yes, when it comes to New Year’s Eve I am quite a humbug.

Humbug! I say.

First I don’t like being around drunk people.

Second I don’t like being kissed by people I don’t know, no matter how attractive.

Third I don’t like getting tons of hugs…again from people I don’t know.

(Think about this…imagine if you are at a New Year’s party with Monrovia assistant Mike Minter…well, I don’t want him to hug me….I don’t His Arroyo Baldness planting a kiss on my cheek and wishing me a happy 2013…I don’t want Big Tony, Big George, Villathedevil, Sunshine, Kansas, Gonzo, or Bad News asking me to join them in a toast…a toast?)

Fourth December 31, 2012 ticking over to January 1, 2013 changes nothing but the calendar.  I still have a mortgage…I still have a car payment…I still have a garage that needs works…a roof with a minor leak at my church…and a magnolia tree that needs to be ripped out of my front yard.

I’m happy for each day…but really, do I have to be extra happy-peppy-bubbly-rad just because the clock strikes midnight and a lot of people decide to make noise.

College football and the bowl games were a reason to be happy about January 1st.

There was something lyrical, sweet, romantic, poetic about the Cotton, Orange, Sugar, and Rose Bowl games.

Now…gag…the names of the bowl games are gross…(and why are we attempting preserve to the integrity of the bowl system?)

Fifth, New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day reminds me of a pending pain. The High School season is long over, the college season is ready to shutdown, and the NFL season has moved into the terminal stage….Am I supposed to be excited about the NBA? Baseball?

The only great day in sports after the Super Bowl is played is the NFL Draft in April.

Did I mention earlier that I am a humbug on this date?

New Year’s Eve advice from someone rapidly showing his age…somewhere, on some cable channel there will be a Marx Brothers marathon going on…Watching the Marx Brothers is the best way to combat New Year’s cheer.

…I also hear that AMC is doing a “Walking Dead” marathon as well…

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News of the San Gabriel Valley since 1966.